Best Cache Ever

It started out like any other day, but soon, it would be twisted beyond my imagination as I embarked on a journey to find a simple cache that had eluded me in the past. I wanted to make sure this cache didn't end up on the permanent DNF list. I have to admit, when I woke up that fateful morning, I wasn't sure whether I could handle the stress of another failure. Three migraines had been caused because I couldn't decode a simple cypher to unlock the mysteries for this particular cache.

That day, however, was different. I had had a good night's sleep and my mind went into zen mode as I whipped through the cypher, decoding it in record time. I'd finally gotten over the hump and saw where my mistake had been all this time. Once that was accomplished, all I had to do was pack my gear and get on the road. I had a long drive and hike ahead of me and I was already burning daylight.

The trip out was rather uneventful, especially if you ignore the train wreck that caused many lookie loos to stop at the side of the road. I was more focused than them and kept moving. It wasn't until hours later back at home that I found out the the train wreck had been caused by a meteor from outer space hitting the ground and undermining the tracks at that particular point. What's amazing was there wasn't any plume of smoke after the meteor hit. Very strange indeed.

Once I got to ground zero, my first clue that I had to find was a pony. Supposedly, this pony had some kind of clue literally hidden on it that would guide me to my next destination. I could not believe my luck when the pony ambled up to me without regard for it's own safety and immediately whispered the clue to me, giving me quite a sensation . Pony's noses are rather hairy and it tickled.

Off I went. The pony had directed me to Route 66. But of course. All great caches in the past that I had found were always found on or near Route 66, the Mother Road. The problem was Route 66 couldn't be found in many spots. I had to find a spot where several important ingredients fell together in one unlikely spot. The spot was a pet graveyard that only had one inhabitant. Apparently, after the first burial, zoning laws started to conflict with the locals and the locals just decided that it wasn't worth the effort or the money just to get Fido buried, so they built another pet cemetery down the road. Who knew that this one gravestone would possibly lead me to the next clue on my journey?

Believe it or not, with the other information that I'd already gathered, the date on Brownie's tombstone fit perfectly. Now, all I had to do was find a field of poppies and ask the tin man a questions. I'd heard that he'd started crying out in a field of poppies and had been abandoned by his friends because they'd had enough of his whining. Apparently, he'd cried one too many tears and the rest of his caching group left him to rust away into nothing. Now, I wasn't the one that was going to help this guy out. I didn't know him from Adam, and I'd heard he could wield a mean axe, so I just quickly stepped in, got the information that someone had graffitied on the back of his torso and got out of there as fast as I could. The poppies were making me sleepy and I really didn't want the same fate to befall me as that poor dog lying near the tin man. Or should I say, what had befallen of that poor dog skeleton. Yuck.

The instant I'd found the clue on the tin man, I knew I was in trouble. Apes?? I had to find an actual ape? What was I to do? I'm not the strongest or bravest man in the world and the thought of walking somewhere, where there might be a wild gorilla out and about was almost more than I could handle. However, I'd already failed at this challenge twice and I was further along than I'd ever been before, so I was not giving up this easily.

The big question I had to solve was where to find an ape along Route 66 in the first place. I had all the clues, or at least I thought I did, so maybe I had to look at all of the clues again, just to get a different perspective on the situation at hand. I laid everything out on the ground and realized that I no long was supposed to follow Route 66, but now had a different route. I looked around and realized that I was long yards away from the next clue and lo and behold, there stood the ape, waiting to give me the next clue. I was absolutely amazed that my luck had held on this vicious cache.

After getting the needed information from the ape, I knew I was now going for the final of this excellent multi-cache. It looked like it was just going to be a short half mile hike along this well shaded trail to final cache hidden inside something dead. Great. All I had to do was control my gag reflexes, reach inside a dead body to find the cache. Simple. Knowing that the hider liked to have finders wade across the Amazon, or hike up a snow covered peak, just to find his caches, I knew that I would have to be prepared for just about anything, but a dead body???? Well, I'd come this far for this cache, I figured I might as well continue.

Eureka!! I found the dead body and was able to extract the cache from its hiding spot. I have to tell you, I wasn't the first to find on this one, but it felt like it. I could not believe the amazing things that were in this cache. It was hard to decide what swag I would take from this cache, but I eventually decided that the certificate for a day as Secretary of the Treasury was well worth the price I'd paid to find this most excellent cache. Now, I had a major decision to make. How could I possible trade at least even? Hmmm. I decided that two field tested bazooka launchers and a signed picture of Elvis and Richard Nixon was well worth even money for what I'd taken. I hope the next finder would enjoy any one of these items.

Now, it was just a hike back to my car and the long drive home. All the while I kept thinking to myself, "self, that was a most excellent cache. You'd better come up with a decent log for this one." Yeah. The log better be decent. It's probably my only two word log that I've ever written for any cache this good. It simply stated, Loof Lirpa.

Pictures were taken at or near the following caches:
Sum of All Fears - by Mr. and Mrs. Rhino
Route 66 - The California Route 66 Museum - by Parsa
Buchy Boy's Final Resting Place - by FullOn
The Mystery of Crowder Canyon - by Tevis Clan
Double Barrel Super-Soaker - by ohgr